Lucky to Have Been Where I Have Been

Okay SOO the wedding is in 53 days! At first when Tripp and I got engaged December seemed so close, but now it seems pretty far away again. Planning is coming along and nothing too stressful has come up yet. Although if I don't find my dress this week, I might go into slight panic mode.. but I think I know where my dress is hiding ;) I'm grateful I will have the opportunity to dress shop with my mom and best friend. Sad that Megan can't come, but that is what we have FaceTime for. I've ordered a lot of reception decorations online, so when they show up it will be a lot easier to buy everything else. We took our engagements last week and are so excited to see them next week! The anticipation will make them that much better :)

The past week or so I have been thinking about all the blessings that come from trials, and struggles that we have in our lives. By all means I am not ready to say I am thankful for my trials yet, but I will say that certain blessings would not have been readily available to me and my family if it were not for a few of the things we have struggled through together. For instance, if there had been one thing that didn't happen in my life, a certain five minutes that I would have wasted, I wouldn't be where I am today. Happily and madly in love with the man of my dreams, ready to enter into the temple and be married to him forever. How crazy that is to me. I can't really explain bliss because everyone has their own versions of happiness, but I believe I have found my happiness.

Sometimes when I wake up in the morning it is hard for me to fathom the word happiness, because often times I think I should still be sad. And some days I am sad, but I also need to be reminded at times that I have had only close to 5 months of healing time from the most tragic, devastating thing that will probably ever happen in my life. But that is why Tripper has been the greatest blessing; understanding. He came into my life right when I came to the understanding of many things in life. The fact that I was going to see my brother again and that he wouldn't want us all to be so upset. My family often times imagines Glen laughing at all of us because he knows so much more than we do. Laughing because we have no idea how safe and how comforted he is. He still has that same smile, that same sense of humor and he will when we see him again. What a glorious reunion my family and I will be having in heaven.

Understanding of our relationship as well. I think, well I know actually, that neither of us ever thought that we could be that typical LDS couple that meets, goes on a few dates and then falls in love. But hey, you just know. Understanding that the Lord is always right and will put us where we need to be, at the right times is a reality check of humility. It's been a humbling experience to accept help from people and to be okay with being upset some days. Tripper is good at that. I know how much men hate a crying woman, because they don't really know what to do, but I found a keeper ;) Being able to talk about anything and not being afraid to display our emotions is really important as well. There is a feeling of peace, safety and acceptance that I feel when I am with Tripper. A feeling that will carry us through the eternities. I am grateful, blessed, and lucky to have been where I have been.

Your trials do not have to define you; but rather let them be a source of change, and strength for the future. No matter what happens, I am thankful everyday to be able to spend another day on this beautiful earth. Life always has a new journey waiting for you to take its course.

A Definition

Happiness. What is happiness? Happiness means something different to almost every one. 

To me, happiness doesn't mean every part of life is joyus and fun. But rather, there are sad, tempting, hard times in life where we can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Happiness is being able to forgive others and more importantly, yourself in situations when we feel worthless and weak. If we are all striving to me like Christ, we should look at what he went through and ask ourselves if he was happy. Everyday Christ went through something different. Ridiculing, painful times, but also very fulfilling, happy moments that we learn(ed) about. The Prince of Peace. The Saviour of us all. The only perfect man to ever walk the earth. So again, what is happiness? Ask yourself. Then ask yourself if you're happy. 

Even with the tragic, tough times that have been given to me in this life, I can say that I'm happy. And I'm happy mainly because of my beliefs. Baptism, service, courage, love, faith, the temple, families, scriptures, marriage, prayer, music (hymns), prophets, Christ's atoning sacrifice, etc. 

In May 2009 Elder Steven E. Snow spoke on happiness. I'm just going to touch on one of the points he made. The talk is titled "Get on With Our Lives"

"Fourth, be of good cheer. Many of our members across the globe are facing challenges, economic and otherwise. At such times it is easy to feel despondent and forgotten. During the early, difficult days of the Church, the Lord counseled the Saints to be happy: “Be of good cheer, little children; for I am in your midst, and I have not forsaken you” (D&C 61:36). (Get On with Our Lives)"

Be of good cheer. Don't let anyone deter your happiness and the person you know you should become. Even when trials, heartache and oppostion are before you, stand up to it and show the world your smile. It's a beautiful, beautiful thing to be happy.